I'm Not The One
by KieshaIshtar
Summary: Bella's in the hospital. Charlie's abusive. Carlisle has been trying to get Bella out of this situation for years. Will a final act before her 18th birthday finally push them together? Based on the song "I'm Not The One" by 3Oh!3. Rated M for a reason!
1. Chapter 1

**Oh gosh, I'm a creeper. I want me some Bella and Carlisle. But if you think about it, it's not much more different than Edward and Bella... He's like, 100 and something... Let's just say Carlisle is wise beyond his years!**

**Disclaimer : I am NOT SM. No way in hell. I wish I was, but I'm not.  
**

**This IS a Belisle story. If you don't like it, don't read it! Though I promise you, it's worth the read. Especially if you've read my past works on is RATED M! That means smut and bad language and everything else that makes a story good. :)  
**

**Song Fic – I'm Not The One by 3Oh!3**

**The words in bold are the lyrics to the song.**

**Carlisle's POV**

I sprinted down the hallway. When I'd heard Bella was in the hospital, I hadn't been able to drive here fast enough. When we'd moved here when she was fourteen, when we first met her, I suggested that she switch into my care, that I be her doctor. For exactly this reason. When they brought her in, I would know immediately.

I met the girl at the front desk and asked her which room my patient, Isabella Swan was in. My Bella... My poor, sweet Bella, what happened?

The nurse told me the room and also handed me a manilla folder. I cracked it open to see Bella's name at the top, nodded to the nurse and then started off towards her room, still out of breath. As I flipped open the folder, I read the case.

_- Patient presented to the hospital, dropped outside entrance. Nearly naked, head wound, possible internal bleeding. _

_- Patient inspected, still unconscious. Moved to hospital room._

God, Bella, what happened to you? I asked myself, jumping into the elevator that would take me to her floor.

_- Patient woke up at 6:43 pm. Confirms our suspicions that she was raped and beaten. Called Doctor Carlisle._

I groaned, sliding my hand through my hair. My sweet Bella, raped... It had probably been another one of her 'jobs'... I was glad no one else was in the elevator with me as I closed the file and threw my fist into the cold steel wall I was boxed in. I slid that same hand through my hair then, trying to think of what to do.

The elevator opened and let me out onto her floor. I let out a deep breath and made my way to her room, trying to gather my thoughts. All my frustration, my anger... It was all aimed at one person. If she'd let me, I'd take care of him. But she was so afraid...

I reached her room and opened the door. She was sitting up in the bed, flicking through the channels on the tv in front of her on the wall. She didn't seem to notice me, so I watched her. I obsessed over her. My bright angel.

She was leaned back on the bed, drumming her fingers on the side of the bed every once in a while as she stopped on a channel. Then she'd start again. As far as I could see, it was my same old Bella.

"Bella," I whispered as I came into the room fully and shut the door behind me. She jumped and I saw her gaze fall on me. Her eyes, they bore into mine. They were beaten, broken, battered. She was falling apart.

**You're way too young to be broken.  
You're way too young to fall apart.**

When she saw me, her eyes lit up a little and I couldn't help a weak smile. As I thought of her as my light, she thought of me as her soul. We completed one another. But I wasn't right for her. I couldn't let her tie herself down to me...

"Carlisle," she said back, softly. My knees nearly went weak. The sound of my name on her breathless lips... It did frightening things to my body.

"Bella, dear, what happened..." I asked, closing the distance between her and reaching for her hand. She had already turned off the tv and attempted to sit up. I tried to press her back down but she wouldn't have it.

"It started out like any other night. I was in Port Angeles. A guy stopped, I got in his car... He drove me to a hotel..." she started, looking up into my eyes. I was letting myself get too attached. But I was in too deep. I didn't know if I could ever let her go.

**You're way too young to play these games,  
But you better start,  
But you better start...**

"He was just a straight up scum bag, Carlisle. I couldn't do anything right for him, and he took it out on me. Eventually, I tried to run," she said. I cringed away, holding onto her hand with one of mine as the other covered my face. I'd known her for so long, I'd known what she was into... But it didn't make these stories any easier. I rarely heard them because she knew I couldn't handle them.

**This is when it starts,  
From the beating of your heart  
Till the streetlamps talk to you.**

"He caught me around the waist, threw me against the wall. He continued to have his way with me," she whispered as I looked up at her again. Tears were in her eyes.

"Jesus, Bella..." I groaned, trying to pull away from her. She was telling me too much. I couldn't know this. I'd kill for her. She knew that. She wouldn't let me hand go and she pulled me back.

"He fucked me, Carlisle. He put his hand around my throat and choked me as he did it," she said, her voice turning bitter, cold, as she used her free hand to pull her hair to the side and show me the bruises. I swallowed my rage.

**Jumping off of the edge,  
Oversleeping your head,  
Everything's turning dark to you.**

"Dr. Cullen, I didn't know anyone had called you," someone said behind me. Bella immediately released my hand and I took a small step back. Dr. Slaten came in, shutting the door behind him. I tried not to roll my eyes. This doctor was the biggest prick. He'd known, years ago, that Bella had a thing for me and I had yet to stop her.

"Yeah, one of the nurse's called me, since Bella's my patient," I said, nearly spitting out the word 'mine' to him. He lifted his eyes to mine and looked quite grim. But behind his eyes, he was laughing. He couldn't wait to see me fall.

"Well, I figured I could take this case off your hands. You need some rest, doc," he said. I wanted to growl, to pounce across the room and rip his throat out. He was playing some kind of stupid game and I wasn't ready for it tonight. I needed time with Bella, alone.

**I went to pick up the parts,  
The doctor's hiding the charts,  
He won't let me see this side of you.**

"May I talk to you outside, since you are here? I have some things to clear with you," he said, indicating with the folder in his hands that we should step outside. I glanced at Bella and she gave me a small, watery smile. I gritted my teeth and turned to follow him out the door. I made sure it was shut before I turned back around to him.

"How dare you keep this from me. She is MY patient, you should have called me immediately," I said, wanting to shove my fist through his face.

"I'm sure that's all she is to you, Dr. Cullen," he said, lethally. I sized him up. He had to only be in his early 30's. He had jet black hair, a long nose, brown eyes. He was the kind of punk that made me glad to be a doctor. He didn't know his head from his ass.

"Anyways, I thought you should know. She might have aids. From what she told us, and from what we saw in the examination, he could have very well be infected and when he raped her, he obviously tore skin. It'll take a few months before we know for sure," he said. My throat closed up on me. I couldn't speak. No, this couldn't be possible... She told me she always used protection and that she'd always be safe.

I turned to my side and looked through the small glass window. I could still see her and she was staring straight at me. Her eyes were worried, stressed. Her eyes led me to her soul.

"I don't think she needs to know the chances of her contracting aids. We can tell her in a few months, when the results come in. There's no reason to worry her," he said, quietly.

**It's on the tip of my tongue,  
You know you're way too young  
To have someone lie to you.**

I whipped around, my eyes on fire. This little piss really did want the shit kicked out of him. He obviously saw my rage, because he took a step back and glanced around. I took a step towards him.

"She deserves to know. What if she were to have a boyfriend? You want her to possibly spread it to him?" I asked, the thought alone lighting me on fire. Bella didn't have a boyfriend. She'd made sure of that. She always kept herself open... For me.

The guilt rode hard on my throat, making me want to collapse.

"You worried about her or you?" he asked and I had it. I shot forward and grabbed him by the scruff of his under shirt and held him against the wall. We were alone in the hallway. I'd known that from the moment I stepped outside the door. Vampire hearing and all.

"You keep your nose out of business it doesn't belong in," I growled, feeling my whole body tense. I wanted to feed off him so badly. I wanted nothing more than for him to die at the point of my teeth. I slammed him against the wall for good measure and then dropped him. He scrambled to his feet and took off down the hallway, leaving me to compose myself before I went in to see Bella.

When I opened the door, her head popped up. She was sitting up in bed, her arms wrapped around her legs and pulling them close to her chest. She looked like a frightened deer. My poor, sweet Bella...

"What happened?" she asked, quietly. I shook my head, not wanting to talk about, still trying to get my rage under my belt. "Carlisle, what is it? What did he say?" she asked, prodding me. I turned away from her, trying to clear my mind. It was impossible. She was pressing me for answers.

"Did you kill him?" she asked, quietly. I turned around and walked over to her, shaking my head.

"No, Bella. But there's news you need to hear," I whispered, taking her hand in mine again.

**I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.  
I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.  
You'd better find somebody else and get a hold of yourself.  
I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.**

Four Years Previous

We had finally gotten all of our possessions moved in. It had taken about a week, but finally we were unpacked and ready to begin our lives again. I had already been accepted at the hospital at Forks and my kids were already enrolled in the school. They should actually be coming home any minute. Everything was going well. For the most part.

"Carlisle, what's wrong with you? There's no more passion in your voice, there's no more love in your actions!" Esme cried in a whisper. I ran my hands through my hair as we sat in our bedroom. I had made sure this room was sound proof. Living in a house full of vampires, it was bad for privacy.

"Esme, I have passion, I have love. It's just gone between us, now. We've talked about this before. We stay together for the others. They need us. Jasper especially. He still hasn't gotten a hold on his hunger," I said, bringing my eyes up to look at her. There was hatred, anger. But most of all, there was sadness. I got to my feet and walked over to her.

"I told you, my dearest Esme... We are but friends now. I've seen you eye the guys, you'll find another. And when that happens, we'll tell them. But until then, they need to see our strong faces. They need to know there's still hope for our family," I said, wrapping my arms around her and pulling her into a hug. It wasn't that I didn't like Esme. It wasn't that I didn't find her attractive.

But she was no longer the one I wanted to spend the rest of my immortal life with. I didn't technically want to spend it with anyone yet. But I didn't want to watch Esme suffer any more. A vampire without sex is like a high person without their munchies. Deadly.

She deserved to have what she wanted in life.

There was a knock at our door and I let out a soft breath. I pulled away and looked at her, wiping the tears from her eyes gently. I kissed her forehead and waited for her to nod before I stepped away to open the door.

"Hey, daddy-oh! We've got company, so behave yourselves," Emmett said, filling up the doorway. We had enrolled them in the high school as sophmores. It had been a stretch. But the earlier they started, the longer we could live here.

"Oh? Who's our guest?" Esme asked, making herself present as she came to my side. She touched my back and I smiled a little. It's not like I didn't enjoy Esme's touch. She was a beautiful woman.

"Eddie brought home a freshman. Her name's Bella. Apparently, he couldn't leave her alone all day. He said she smells delicious," Jasper said, popping up behind Emmett. I gave him a stern look.

"Behave yourself, Jasper," I warned and he lowered his eyes. "Let's go meet her, shall we?" I asked.

They led the way down the stairs and Esme and I followed, communicating silently with our eyes. A human in the house? So soon? Hopefully this wouldn't become a habit.

"Dad, this is Bella. Bella, this is Carlisle, my dad, and Esme, my mother," Edward said, speeding through the introductions. He was extremely fidgety. The girl must really be driving him crazy.

The girls head lifted a little as she was introduced and I was dumb struck. I blinked, several times. Esme moved forward to welcome the small girl to our home while I just stared.

She was beautiful. She was but fourteen, maybe. But she was incredible. Her eyes were brown, sweet, broken, innocent. There was something behind them that she was trying to mask. I wanted to know what it was. I finally broke out of my stupor and stepped forward, offering my hand.

"Hello, my dear. We're glad to have you. Please, make yourself at home," I said. Her hand... It was so warm, so small and fragile in my hold. I wanted to pull her close, feel her body flush against mind. I mentally batted at myself. What the fuck was wrong with me? She was fourteen!

_Everyone's wrong compared to you... You're over four centuries old,_ my thoughts ran through my head. Yeah, but this was a little different.

"Thank you. You have an amazing home," the quiet girl said, looking up at me. I swallowed, glancing at Edward. There was no doubt he was reading my mind, but I just couldn't stop. She looked so... needy. Something had happened in her life... Was happening? Was it still happening? God, I wanted to save her...

**You're way too young to be broken.**

Three Years Previous

"Carlisle, beware. Bella's here. Edward invited her, but he won't be happy to know you're still here. You were supposed to leave for California this afternoon," Esme warned me, coming close and pretending to kiss my cheek as she spoke. I blinked, feeling the tingles start to run through my arms and chest at the thought of Bella.

The day after we'd first met, after Bella had left, Edward had been furious.

"How can you have such impure thoughts about a fourteen year old girl? With your wife standing right beside you!" Edward had screamed, locked in my room with me to keep our conversation quiet.

"The same way you can have impure thoughts about her, Edward," I said, in no mood for his bitching. I was too irritated with myself. How could I have felt this way about such a small, hopeless girl? Why did my heart decide to come alive at the sight of her?

Edward glared at me, threatening me with his eyes.

"It's not the same. You're older," he growled. I rolled my eyes.

"Eventually, age doesn't make a difference," I mumbled, running my hand through my hair.

"What about Esme?" he asked, his anger dying and his desperation making itself present. He didn't want to lose the girl. He was truly interested in her and didn't want me to swoop in on her. I sighed. Would he keep his mouth shut? I explained my situation with Esme to him. He didn't like it. He hated it. But he agreed to keep it quiet around the others. He cared for Jasper's sanity too. If the family began to fall apart, Jasper would too, and we couldn't let him result to his old ways.

"I'll keep it quiet... But you need to stay away from Bella," he said, nearly begging. "Just give me a chance with her. I know I can make it work. I need this, Carlisle," he said, pleading with me. I stared at a point behind his shoulder, shutting my emotions down.

And I had agreed with him that night. I would give him his chance. Actually, I would give him several chances. I knew I would be bad for Bella. I knew that I would destroy her life. But so would my son.

_But at least he looks young enough to belong with her,_ my inner voice said. And I had agreed with it. Edward would be much better for Bella than me.

But she had proven difficult. As she got more comfortable with my family, had gotten more comfortable coming over to our house, I had had to deal with seeing her, tempting me, eventually every day. Until the time came when she realized we never ate.

Until we had been careless one day and most of the food had spoiled in our fridge. Until she had realized that we were not what we said we were. We were not human.

And we had told her what we were. Surprisingly, she still came around. She still enjoyed our company. She still stayed with us, keeping our secret.

And she still looked broken.

**You're way too young to fall apart.**

"I'll try my best, but you know she always finds me. You know I've tried to keep my distance from the girl," I whispered quickly in Esme's ear. She giggled as if I'd said something sweet.

"Just be careful, Carlisle. You know Edward's temper," she said softly, this time actually kissing my cheek. I know she cared for me, still wanted me, but Bella had driven a wedge even further between us. As she walked away, my eyes looked after her longingly. A man had to be gay to not want her.

I had walked around the backyard, dodging Bella whenever I could. She always seemed to know where I was. How could she be so persistent? She was only fifteen. Mind you, she was going on sixteen, but still. Why wouldn't she just leave well enough alone?

"Carlisle," her voice suddenly floated to me. I swallowed, closing my eyes as I turned around to face her. Her voice was like a spring breeze on the ocean, floating and calming me, putting all my fears at ease. I sighed as I opened my eyes to see her.

"Bella," I said, softly, taking in her appearance. She really did live to tempt me. She was filling out more. The dress she wore, it had a lengthy v neck that showed off just how much she'd grown. Even though a scarf was around her neck, it didn't hide what I wanted to see. It was a black dress, clinging to her in all the right placed. I realized it cut off at her mid thigh. I licked my lips as my eyes fell back on hers. She was practically glowing, knowing how she affected me.

"You've been avoiding me," she said, her voice playful, pouty.

**You're way too young to play these games,  
But you'd better start,  
But you'd better start.**

"What would make you say that?" I asked, trying to take my eyes off her. When I tried to turn away, my body was like a magnet and pulled me right back to her. My eyes danced over her cleavage, her lean stomach, her shoes, her legs...

"It's not the biggest backyard," she said, smiling as she looked around. My heart melted. God what I wouldn't give to grab this girl, push her up against the side of the garage and take her. Just like she wanted to be taken.

"Bella, I'd never avoid you if I had the choice," I said, smiling and lifting my drink to my lips. I needed something to preoccupy me from leaning in and taking her lips.

She watched me, her eyes glossing over the drink, devouring me. WHY did she do this to me?

"If you had the choice," she repeated in a whisper, her eyes lowering. "It's because of Edward, then?" she asked. I opened my mouth to speak, to deny it, but she rolled her eyes and let out an exasperated sigh.

"Carlisle, I don't want him... I like him, he's a friend... He's cute, but I just... I don't know, it's not there. I know he wants it to be, but I just can't be with him. My dad would kill me-" she cut off her last words, letting them die off quickly. But she had uncovered something that I'd been longing to know for over a year. Her life.

"What do you mean, Bella?" I asked, sidling closer to her. She glanced around, focusing in on all the people. She brought her eyes back to me and indicated over her shoulder. I followed her until we came to the side of the garage (had she read my mind?) and she stopped, turning to face me.

"I'm tired of hiding... I need someone to talk to, but I don't trust anyone enough," she said, her voice breaking a little. Suddenly I thought I might have broken off more than I could chew.

"Bella, I'm here, you can tell me," I said, softly, getting closer to her. She brought her tear filled eyes up to look at me and I melted in her hands. Everything shown through at me then. All her pain, her weaknesses. Her depression, her anger, her fear.

"God, what does he do to you?" I asked, lifting my hand up to brush her hair out of her eyes. A tear leaked over the edge and I couldn't help myself. I leaned forward and touched my tongue to her cheek, stopping the tear in its tracks. She moaned out softly and so did I. An electric current swept through us and nearly brought me to my knees. I pulled away a little, placing my hand on the wall of the garage, right beside her head. I locked her between me and the wall, watching her.

She slowly brought her hands up to the scarf around her neck and loosened it, showing me a bright red welt and bruises marring her neck. I stepped back a little, feeling the rage start to sweep through me. I breathed in through my nose, trying to keep my cool.

"I'll kill him," I whispered, glancing out at the forest surrounding our house. I would go to their house and I would slip in and rip his throat out-

"No, Carlisle, please... I don't-... Charlie's a drunk, he's harmless, most of the time. He just..." her voice broke a little and I turned around to face her. "He's emotionally abusive, physically abusive, but he loves me. He really does, I just do things wrong all the time-" she started but I shook my head, using my speed to reach her. She took in a quick breath. Even though she knew about us, I didn't really flash my powers in front of her. She looked up at me, her eyes sparkling as I touched my fingers to her lips.

"Bella, don't make excuses for him... You don't do anything wrong. You could never do anything wrong," I said, searching her eyes. She smiled a little and I let out a deep breath. She would be the death of me.

I took a step back, realizing that we weren't all by ourselves at this house. I had a party to attend to and this looked utterly wrong, no matter who came by. I took a step back and she leaned further up against the wall. I wanted to take her. So badly.

"Do you have a light?" she asked, quietly. I almost had to look twice at her, not sure if she'd asked. She was digging in her purse.

"Excuse me?" I asked, watching her dig.

"A light?" she asked, finally pulling out her desired object. A box of cigarettes. I swallowed, not wanting to watch her destroy herself. She looked up, saw the look on my face, no doubt. She smiled.

"I'll do it with or without your help," she said. I sighed and dug into my pants pocket for a lighter I had used earlier to light the candles around the house. I walked over to her and she smiled as she held the cigarette to her mouth. I leaned forward and lit it, getting closer to her than I really needed to in order to light it.

"... We're always here for you. If you ever need anything, if you need to get away-" I started but she pulled back and let a puff of smoke off from the cigarette. I clicked the lighter off.

"Charlie's the chief of police, Carlisle. He can do whatever he wants in this little ass town. I'm branded his until I'm eighteen," she said, her voice bitter and full of hatred

**It was the second I lit  
Your first cigarette,  
I forget who you used to be.**

"Bella, we can get you away. I can help you-" I started, feeling like I was drowning. After finding this out about her, I couldn't just let her go back to him.

"Stop. There's nothing that can be done. And I'm not going to drag you down with me. I'm only three years away from eighteen... I'll survive. And after that, I'll be free," she said, speaking as she looked out to the side, into the forest. She spoke of freedom as if it were the only thing she desired. I let out a soft breath and touched my fingertips to her cheek briefly before stepping away.

How could you help someone who didn't want to be helped? Who was already so used to this life style that she had deluded herself into staying in it just a little while longer?

I downed the rest of my drink as she took the last drag on her cigarette. She stepped it into the concrete and then nodded to my drink.

"Do you want a refill?" she asked. I blinked, moving forward and opening my mouth to say I'd get it. She shook her head a little, giving me a coy little smile and blocked my way, taking the glass from my hand. She leaned up to my ear.

"I'll get it," she whispered heavily and I let out a deep breath as she stepped away. What was this girl doing? Not just with me, but with her life? This couldn't be what she wanted... This wasn't what I wanted for her.

She walked away with my glass and I watched her, my chest feeling heavy and anxious. There were too many thoughts in my head. I didn't know what to do.

A minute later, I saw her walking back with a drink in her hands. A very large drink. I concealed myself around the corner as I watched her, biting on my lip. Her legs, they went on for miles...

And then I watched her stop and take a drink, her eyes closing as the liquid seeped down her throat. She stood there for a good ten seconds, slowly sipping on the glass, easing whatever tension she had been feeling.

**And I bit my lip  
The second you sipped  
The poison that was mixed for me.**

She finally stopped and continued on her way to me. I pulled back and pretended to just be leaning against the garage as she came around the corner. She smiled and handed me my drink. I arched my eyebrow at her as she set it in my hand.

"A little empty, don't you think?" I asked, my voice coming out huskier than usual. She gave a small shrug of her shoulder and then walked back out to the party, swaying her hips and leaving me with half a drink and a painful erection.

**I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.  
I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.  
You'd better find somebody else and get a hold of yourself.  
I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.**

Present Time

"Bella, there's a big possibility that you could have aids," I said to her, gripping her hand gently. She blinked and sort of spaced out. I knew she wasn't focusing on me anymore. I let out a deep breath, wanting to tell her this was as hard for me as it was for her. But I'd already made my choice. If she would agree to it.

"Tomorrow's your eighteenth birthday. I want to take you home with me," I said, watching her. Her eyes drifted into her lap. Suddenly, she started crying. I stood up and leaned close to her, running my hand over her back. I shut my eyes, breathing her in. She smelled of soap and Bella. Just Bella.

"I only had to make it one more day, Carlisle... One more day... Why did this happen?" she whispered, finally breaking through to look up at me. I leaned down a little and grabbed her chin in my hand, looking straight into her eyes.

"Bella, calm down... This isn't the end," I said, gazing into her eyes. Those eyes that had me at day one. Those eyes that had helped me ruin Edward's love life.

Those eyes.

"Please, come home to my house tomorrow. You won't ever need to go back to that scum bag, ever again," I said.

Even as she shook her head, those eyes said yes.

The Next Day

I brought Bella home with me that next day. I never left her alone. I spent the night with her in that room and was there in the morning when she woke up. She had been checked out around noon and as we came home, no one was there but Esme. She gave a brief nod at Bella and Bella acknowledged her as well. I lef her straight to my room so she could rest.

"Do you want to take a shower?" I asked, setting her purse down beside the bed. She turned and nodded and I led her to the bathroom. She started to undress before me and I immediately turned around, letting out a deep breath. This was Bella. This had always been Bella. She wouldn't be afraid to show me her body. She already knew, somehow, that I wanted her completely.

"Carlisle," she said softly, after a minute. I took my chances and turned around, seeing her already in the shower, her head poking out from behind the smoked glass. Whatever animal blood was inside my system ran cold. All I could think about was her.

"Can you get me a drink? For when I get out?" she asked. I swallowed, nodding a little. It was the least I could give her.

I went downstairs and was glad Esme was nowhere around. I poured some vodka into a glass with ice and filled it the rest of the way with hawaain punch. It was basically the only thing we had to mix with.

I walked upstairs with the drink, wanting to die. How was I supposed to do this? How was I supposed to deal with all of this? Edward would be furious...

I closed the door behind me and heard the shower was already off. Before I even could look around for a place to set the drink, she opened the door and stepped out in a cloud of steam. She was wrapped in a towel, so I should have been thankful.

But it wasn't enough. She needed to be covered.

"Clothes?" I asked, as she moved forward to reach for the drink. She gave me a small, hurt look.

"You expect me to put those old clothes on? The ones from yesterday?" she asked. I swallowed and licked my lips as I looked down at her.

_Please, put ANYTHING_ _on,_ I begged. She instead took the glass from my hand and started drinking. I put my hand on hers to keep her from downing the whole thing in one sitting.

**Drink the poison lightly,  
'Cause there are deeper and darker things than you.  
I know 'cause I've been there too.**

"Bella, this can't be how you live your life... You don't need the alcohol, please..." I begged, putting my hand over the glass in case she thought of taking another drink. She stepped up against me, pressing her body flush against mine. It nearly knocked the wind out of me. I pressed my forehead against hers and closed my eyes, trying to gain my will power back.

"What would you know, Carlisle? Just let it be," she said, pulling the drink out of my reach. I grabbed her wrist and she dropped the drink out of reflex as I pushed her back until she sat on the bed behind her. I kneeled down between her knees and looked up at her, silently begging with my eyes.

"Bella, I'm here for you. Edward, Emmett, Alice, we're all here for you. But you need to confide in them, you need to tell them what's going on, and you need to let go of all the bad things in your life," I said, watching her. She looked down at me, cold, nearly heartless.

"I might have aids. I'd like to say I can drink because of that," she said, looking past me to the floor where the alcohol now started seeping into the carpet. I grabbed her chin and made her look at me again.

"Listen to me. I need you to listen completely," I said, not knowing how I was going to do this. I suddenly decided I didn't care. I couldn't stand by and watch Bella destroy herself, her human body, any longer. There would be consequences later. But for now-

"If you have aids, if it turns out that that is the case, I will turn you into a vampire myself," I said, looking into her eyes to make sure she saw I was serious. "I will turn you into a vampire."

First, she looked confused. Then I watched all the different emotions flash over her face. Happiness. Fear. Sadness. Anger. Anticipation. I hadn't known if she really wanted to become a vampire. She'd never mentioned it to me or Edward. But I guess she didn't find that idea so unappealing.

"But... You need to stay completely sober until you find out. I want you to start living your life as if it were normal. I want you to be happy, knowing that you will live through this no matter what. I want you to start over. I want you to become someone," I said, looking deep into her eyes.

"I'll be with you," she whispered. I blinked, taken aback. How could that be the most important thing on this girls mind? I sighed, leaning back so I could take in a deep breath as I shut my eyes.

"I want... I need you to become someone, without me. You don't need me in your life, Bella. You can be with Edward-" I started, but apparently that was the wrong thing to say. She shot up and nearly knocked me backwards. Had I been human, I would have fallen on my ass. I shot up to my feet instead.

"You want me to turn me into a vampire and then give me to your son? What am I, a toy for you to be amused by? Someone you can fix and then pass on? I don't _want_ your son, I want you, Carlisle!" she cried. I ran my hand through my hair, my eyes escaping her deadly ones.

"Bella, I can't be with you! I'm not the one who wants to hurt you! You need to find someone else, I'm not right for you! You need to live a normal life!" I yelled back at her, so frustrated, so fed up, so done. I couldn't fight her any more. I couldn't fight this feeling inside me, but I knew it was right. I couldn't let her be with me. I couldn't hurt her like I had Esme.

**I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.  
I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.  
You'd better find somebody else and get a hold of yourself.  
I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.**

She stood there, facing me in silence. Her eyes were burning holes into my skin, but I couldn't look up at her. If I did, I might fall apart. I might give into her. Her eyes made me do things I'd never thought I would.

"Fine," she shot, her voice deadly. And with that, she walked across the room and opened the door and left. To where, I didn't know.

The Next Day

I hadn't seen Bella in the house the whole day before, but I knew she was there. I could smell her. Bella had a very distinct scent. Edward had come to yell at me, but I had stopped him with one glare. I wasn't in the mood. I had already denied my Bella, the one who made me complete. I had made her hate me. I couldn't stand to be inside my skin.

Not even Esme could make me feel better when she came to the room that night. Sure, we sat and talked, watched tv together, I confided in her what I'd done. She tried to tell me what I'd done was the right thing, but I could tell through her voice. She didn't even think it was right. I was tearing myself apart. But even worse, I was tearing Bella apart. What kind of person was I?

So today, I sat sulking in my room, unable to bare the sight of anyone else. A glance at the clock told me it was already noon. I had already taken a shower, cleaned the room, exercised, and read through some of my work from the hospital. I couldn't concentrate on a single thing other than Bella.

A knock at the door came and I let out a deep breath. It was probably Esme, coming to check on me. I turned off the tv, got out of bed and made my way to the door. Once I opened it, my mouth nearly dropped.

It was Bella.

**I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.  
I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.  
I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.  
I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you. **

"Carlisle, I'm sorry for yesterday. I was completely wrong... Can we talk?" she asked, the last question very quiet. I took a step back and allowed her into my room, unable to speak. What was she doing coming to me? She was supposed to be furious. I shut the door behind her and pressed my head against it, trying to get my resolve together again to turn her away.

"Carlisle, I know what you want for me. I agree to your terms, to be sober, to straighten up, to get a life together for myself... But I can't be with Edward. I can't be with anyone else," she said. I couldn't help myself. I turned around to face her, needing to see her. I needed Bella. I needed her in my life.

"I'm in love with you. I can't change that. Ever since I first met you, you were the only man I think about. No one compares to you. No one knows me like you do. I don't trust any one else like I do you..." she said, her eyes dropping to look away from me.

_No, please, look at me,_ I begged, needing to see her eyes. I needed everything about her.

"I'm going to fall apart... I need someone strong to help me through this. I need you," she said, bringing her eyes to mine again.

**I know it might seem frightening  
To have the world fall apart right under your shoes.  
Trust me,  
You'll make it through...**

I couldn't help it any more. I moved forward and pulled Bella into my arms, feeling her warm body flush against mine. I closed my eyes and buried my nose into her hair. I didn't have the ability to tell her I needed her the same way. I couldn't gather the courage to tell her I thought she was my soul mate.

All I could do was pull my head back, lift her lips to mine and claim her mouth with everything I had.

**A/N : ... Ok, sooo... This wasn't supposed to end up this long. I just started writing this and then fell apart at the seems. This wrote itself. **

**I really want to write a Belisle lemon. Should I? Can I? Oh pretty pretty please, readers? Give me the reviews that say yes?**

**And I REALLY need feedback on this. It will help me grow as a Belisle writer. I'm really anxious right now about the feedback about this... Pretty please with yummy delicious Twilight characters on top?  
**


	2. Chapter 2

God, I am SO sorry this took so long to get out. I had to keep up with my other story and I just have not had a moment to myself in so long. I apologize if there are ANY grammar/spelling mistakes in here. It's a pet peeve of mine but I just DON'T have the time to go back through it. If you guys spot anything, let me know?

Please, if you haven't heard this song, and you most likely haven't, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE! Listen to it. The lyrics don't do it justice, and I can guarantee it will make this chapter that much better for you. Below is the youtube address. Take out the parenthesis and replace them with the words inside to get to the page.

Between Two Points by The Glitch Mob ft. Swan

http(colon)(double slash)www(dot)youtube(dot)com(slash)watch?v=9VV8sgVSZNQ

Chapter Two – Between Two Points

Carlisle's POV

Her lips were something I couldn't describe. Silk wasn't as soft as her. A furnace wasn't even an adequate explanation of how hot her mouth was on mine. She was a thing of my dreams, a sweet sensation I'd never before experienced. She was a liquid fire, consuming me and devouring all my thoughts like a wildfire.

The kiss that we shared wasn't tame. It wasn't sweet, or loving, or one a vampire should indulge in with a human. It was primal, feral, passionate and filled with lust. I had been denying myself for too long. She had been respectful of the distance between us for too long. I was no longer capable of forming the word no.

**We've got forever  
Slipping through our hands**

Before I could stop myself, I had backed Bella up against the wall and she emitted a little gasp that had my veins throbbing for her. Among other things. I slid my hand up her side, bringing her shirt up to her chest. She broke the kiss and tilted her head back, making me slide my mouth to her neck. I could smell her blood, running through her veins. I squeezed my eyes shut, taking in a deep breath.

_Slow down, Carlisle… _I thought, urging myself to think of Bella, this wild temptress. She was having none of it. As I tried to calm myself, she slid her hand up into my hair and gave a harsh tug that made me groan into her shoulder. I grabbed her arm and pushed it against the wall above her head, nearly panting in order to keep control, to not bite into her and give into my instincts that I'd fought for so long.

"Carlisle," she whined my name, her back arching into the wall. She was trying to kill me. Or kill herself, I didn't really know which it was at present. I pushed my forehead into her shoulder, resisting. Resisting, combating, refusing… Suffering. I had had enough. All I wanted to do was give in. All she wanted me to do was give in.

"Isabella, please," I moaned, keeping my eyes shut. Surely if I saw her, I would lose whatever restraint I had.

"I love it when you call me that," she breathed. I felt her writhing sensually against me and shook my head, smiling a little.

"You hate being called that," I said, kissing her shoulder and moving up to press my forehead to hers.

"It's something no one calls me. I reserve it for you, now," she said. I finally opened my eyes and was met with two large, brown orbs. The depths of them seemed to never end as I watched them fill with lust. Her free hand came up and brushed my cheek. I leaned into her touch, my eyes shutting briefly before I rounded on her again. I pressed my lips against hers, claiming her once more.

She was everything I'd been searching for, for four hundred years. In all the time I'd waited, I day dreamt of someone like her. But not even my most lucid day dream could compare to this reality. She almost made me feel human again. I didn't need to breathe but I found myself feeling like my lungs were on fire because I couldn't get oxygen to them. I was gulping in the air just as much as she was.

And then her nails were raking across my scalp. I let out a growl and bit her lip. She moaned, driving my hormones further. My head was spinning as my hand shot down and grabbed her thigh, pulling it onto my hip so I could thrust my hips against hers.

"God!" she cried out. The sound of her voice rang heavy in my ears as I rubbed up against her, holding her leg so she wouldn't move away. I doubt she would have, but the thought of not feeling the tender skin at her thigh nearly drove me mad.

Her mouth was hungry, trying to take mine over. I lowered her hand and, instead, used mine to brace against the wall. Her now free hand joined the other in its assault on my hair. I gripped her thigh tighter as her hips started thrusting to the rhythm I had set. My mind grew hazy, clouding over with lust and my own destruction.

I let out a deep growl and pulled away from her mouth, panting. I couldn't lose this battle. If I did, I'd lose her.

"Bella, I can't do this," I begged, feeling her hands tight on the back of my neck. Even though there was nothing she could do to keep me there, as my strength was much more than hers, she tried. I let her succeed.

"Carlisle, please. I can't wait any longer," she murmured, leading kisses from my temple to my jaw, which was tensed considerably.

"My love, we have forever," I said, my voice catching in my throat. Panic was slowly parting through the lust. I had been so close to devouring her.

"We'll take it slower…" she pleaded. Her hands were urging me to look at her, to open my eyes. I couldn't deny her and I opened my eyes to look at her. Somehow, she smiled. "I just need you. I've waited too long for this, I need you," she whispered, making my heart ache. How was I supposed to deny her?

**We've got more time  
To never understand**

I couldn't. I released her leg and she lowered her foot to the floor as I slid my hand into her hair and pulled her against me. This kiss was much slower, much more tame. In some way, it made me feel even more a monster. Her lips were so soft, so yielding. What did I feel like to her? Hard? Cold? I could only imagine.

"I don't want to hurt you," I said, keeping my lips touching hers as the kiss ended. She didn't move away, or even move forward for more. I had to throw out as many road blocks for her as I could. I couldn't deny her, but I was so afraid for her life. I'd never been tempted so horribly before, not even when I was newborn.

"Carlisle, you can only fix me. You could never hurt me," she said. My lips lifted at the corner in an ironic smile. She wouldn't let me get out of this one. I kissed the corner of her mouth, making my way to her jaw. She turned her head up so I could reach her more easily. I nibbled my way across her skin, finding her earlobe and tugging on it gently. Her gasps and moans of pleasure were soothing now, no longer urgent or demanding.

"Come here," I whispered into her ear. I began to pull her, kissing her neck as I led her to the bed, walking backwards. Her hands had stopped their torture, braced on my shoulders as I walked with her. When my legs hit the back of the bed, I wrapped one arm around her waist and quickly turned to lower her onto the bed.

She let out a quick breath and I opened my eyes to see her smiling.

"You vampires and your speed," she said, crawling up the bed a little. I lowered myself between her legs and followed her, our bodies never further apart than they needed to be. When her head rested on the pillow, I came to a halt. I let my nose ghost a trail over her cheek, down her neck, across her chest.

"Isabella, you need to stop me if I hurt you. Scare you- anything. Promise me," I said, breathing at the swell of her breast. I glanced up at her, my lips barely brushing over her. Her eyes were large, doe-like. She held so many emotions inside her. She nodded, but I shook my head, a spark igniting in my lips as they came into contact with her skin. She inhaled, confirming my thought that she felt it too. "Out loud. Promise me out loud."

"I promise, Carlisle. Please- please," she begged. I could hear the quiver in her voice, her hope, her anticipation. I closed my eyes and finally let my lips fall on her chest.

**Falling footsteps  
Weighing heavy on me**

I tried to keep my calm but there were too many sensations. Bella's skin tasted how cocoa butter and vanilla smelled, as I couldn't compare tastes any more. It was soft, giving, hot. Her moan was urgent. I'd never heard such a weak sound reveal so much pleasure. Her hips had jumped up to press against mine, causing my arousal to come into contact with her heat.

And this time when I breathed in, her arousal smelled stronger than I'd ever sensed. Her legs were spread with me between them, causing the aroma to surround me, drag me into all that was Bella.

As she squirmed below me, I could feel her hands twisting in the sheets at her side. I reached my hand up and cupped her ribs, right below her breast to keep her still as I moved my mouth lower. I was getting closer to my goal, her skin becoming softer. Her writhing became more anxious as I lapped my tongue across her skin. I could feel her heart beating strong, fast beneath the surface.

I stayed there for a minute before reaching up with my free hand and pulling the neck of her shirt, along with her bra, exposing more of her skin. I moved further south, further away from the pink nub that she so desperately wanted me near. She whimpered, but kept from her words. I paid attention to this spot for another minute, sucking her skin softly, before moving to the valley between her breasts.

"Carlisle, please!" she cried, finally giving in. It took me but a millisecond to reach her peaked nipple and wrap my mouth around it. Her moan, her cry of ecstasy caused me to squeeze her ribs, pushing her breast up a little. Her sensitive nub was exactly what my tongue needed. I traced the tip of it then pressed my tongue flat against it, breathing heavily through my nose.

Her hand slipped into my hair and started tugging, making it even harder for me to breathe. Her shirt, her bra, everything was getting in the way. I heard a snarl fill the room as I slipped my arm under her and yanked her to a sitting position so I could rip her shirt off over her head. My hand that was on her back holding her up moved to the clip and snapped it, making the flimsy, irritating material slip off her shoulders. I threw it to the floor to join the shirt as I returned my attention to her breasts.

I moved to the breast I hadn't circled yet and devoured her. She cried out as I flicked my tongue over her nipple repeatedly. Her back arched and I pulled her up into me as she shoved her core against my erection. I pulled my mouth away from her and gritted my teeth, pressing my forehead into her shoulder.

"Bella, stop," I said, gasping for air.

"I can't help it, you're driving me insane," she breathed, lowering her butt back to the bed. I followed her, lifting my head so I could kiss her jaw as I lowered her back into a laying position. I kissed her lips, then her jaw, continuing down, through the valley of her breasts until I felt her stomach start to quake. The movement made me anxious, made me full of anticipation. I pulled back to glance up at her before I looked lower, seeing her pants hiding her from my vision.

"I don't think I can stop myself," I whispered, mesmerized by the tenderness of her skin leading down to where I'd only dreamt of going for the past few years. I heard her whisper something that sounded like 'please, don't stop' as I brought my hands up and worked the button of the jeans open. The zipper sounded through the room, loud as a siren. My hands were shaking as I grabbed the top of the pants and began to slide them down.

Her hips rose to help me and for a moment, I got lost in the way she looked. The smoothness of her skin, the curve of her hips, the sheer color of her underwear. I licked my lips as I slid the pants off her feet and then dropped them with the rest of her clothes. My eyes slid up the milky color of her thighs, threatening to take me over.

"Carlisle?" Bella asked, snapping me out of it. I brought my eyes up to her, knowing mine were probably pitch black, the color of night. "Can I take your shirt off?" she asked, weakly. I felt some of the tension leave me. My Bella… So soft, so feeble, so fragile… My gaze softened as I moved closer to her as she sat up.

"You can do anything you want with me, Isabella," I whispered in her ear as her hands came to rest on my chest. I could feel her heartbeat through her fingertips. It was fast but strong. Her shaky hands were betraying her. Of course she'd done things with other men. This was in no way her first time. But I had a feeling this was the first time that actually meant something to her. I kneeled between her legs and brought my hands up to rest on hers.

"I love everything about you… The way you sound, the feel of your skin… There's nothing you can do to wrong me," I said, softly, rubbing my nose along the ridge of her ear. I slid her hands down my chest, atop my shirt, trying to ease her mind. I moved to her neck and kissed her there before leaning back and letting her hands go. She watched me for a moment before she sat up a little straighter and started undoing the buttons of the shirt I was wearing.

It was a slow, agonizing torture. I could feel the brush of her fingertips against my skin every so often, igniting the fire inside me once again. But I let Bella do this her way. I let her take her time, because I'm sure she'd never had this luxury before. As she was about halfway done with the buttons on the shirt, she caught me off guard by slipping her hands into the opening the shirt provided and running her nails across my chest.

I took in a sharp intake of breath and leaned my head on top of hers, groaning. It encouraged her hands to go on. She raked her nails over my skin, over and over again, working me to a pant. I wanted to speak, to beg her to stop before I lost all my control when she withdrew her hands. She grabbed the bottom of my shirt and I leaned back as she pulled it off over my head.

Her hands were like a furnace as they came back and attached themselves to my shoulders, bringing me close to her as she laid back in the bed. Our lips came together in a heated mesh as my hand ghosted over her body. Starting at her thighs, as low as I could reach, I brought my hand slowly up over her hips, her side, her breast, all the way until I could cradle her face with my hand.

I started to pull away, placed one more soft kiss before I started on my way back down.

"You've distracted me," I said against her skin.

**Behind darkness  
Beneath candles  
Whispers waltz  
Around our dreams**

I was in between her legs the next second, unable to keep away my need any longer. I needed to hear Bella moan, crying in ecstasy. I need to see her at the peak of her orgasm, hanging on to no sanity. I brought my thumbs up to stroke the sensitive skin at the inner parts of her thighs. She writhed against the bed and I glanced up as I hooked my fingers into the sides of her underwear and started pulling down. She lifted her hips once again to help me.

As the final barrier covering her from me was removed, her scent invaded my senses. It was unbearable to move slowly, but I did what I could to control myself. I dropped her panties with the rest of our discarded clothes before lowering myself, slowly, keeping my eyes on her. She was biting on her lip, watching me, closely. I wanted to see those eyes squeezed shut in pleasure.

I lowered my head and kissed the inside of her thigh. She whimpered. I moved to the other, dragging my tongue in a small line. She shifted and I had to reach up with one hand to hold her still at her hip. She let out another soft whimper before I took in a deep breath and drowned in her scent. I couldn't hold back anymore.

I pressed forward and drew my tongue from her opening to the tip of her sensitive bundle of nerves, pressing firmly.

"Carlisle!" she cried out, her hips fighting against my hand. Something pressed through my stomach as she called out my name that way. It made me gasp and then return to do the same thing, my tongue moving from center to top, a little more roughly than I'd meant to, but she continued all the same.

"Jesus, Carlisle- oh, God," she gasped out as I rounded my tongue on her again. Her hip was moving against my hand but I didn't let it move far. I kept her pinned there as I let her taste slip down my throat, warm and delicate. She tasted just how Bella should taste. I moaned out a little as my tongue dove into her center, working furiously to taste more of her.

I almost couldn't hear Bella anymore, through the ringing in my ears. I could make out sharp cried every once in a while, but I was too focused on what I wanted to do to her. My tongue was inside her, thrusting in and out, cradling her skin. I swallowed every chance I got, taking her in. I move my tongue to her clit and started flicking it, slowly at first, to get her used to the feeling. But as her moans of pleasure continued, I went faster, harder.

"Oh, please. Carlisle, I need more," she gasped. I could hear it in her voice. She was so close, so prepared to fall over the edge of pleasure and into oblivion. I brought my hand that had been on her hip to her pussy and drove my middle finger in deeply. She screamed out and I could feel her back arch as I resumed my previous task of flicking her clit with my tongue.

**The shortest distance  
Between two points  
Is the line  
From me to you**

I drove my finger in and out of her. In the back of my mind, I knew I should be treating her with more care, be moving more slowly, but her words, her cries of ecstasy, were all I needed to know this was what she wanted. She was crying out through sharp intakes of breath. I could feel her body tensing and I pressed my tongue harder to her clit, rubbing it.

Suddenly, all her noises stopped. Her breathing caught, her moans fell silent, her body was harder than a brick as every muscle inside her tensed. And then she exploded. Her body shuddered and she screamed out, louder than I'd ever heard her. I withdrew my finger and replaced it with my tongue, lapping slowly at her core to bring her down.

She was shaking even a minute later and her breathing was still labored as I pulled away and pressed my forehead against her thigh. My eyes were shot tightly as I breathed, my own body tense from lack of release.

"God," I moaned out, still tasting her on my tongue. I would never get enough of her, even if we spent eternity together. I pulled back a little and crawled up her body, wiping my mouth with my hand on the way up. When I kissed her, I was expecting her to be weak, lifeless, sated.

But when had Bella ever been what I'd expected?

Her mouth was hungry, vicious. She pulled on my lip, biting and nibbling on me. I moaned out, my erection throbbing wildly.

"Take off your pants," she whispered as she pulled away. My eyes flew open to see her staring up at me, her eyes dilated with the adrenaline still running through her body.

"Bella, we don't have-"

"I want to. Carlisle, I need you inside me. Please, I need more," she begged, though there was no begging in her eyes. Her eyes demanded, required me to do what she wanted. I bit on my lip as I leaned back and hastily undid the button on my pants and kicked them off, along with the briefs I wore.

**Feet turning black  
Is this the path we must walk  
No turning back**

I lowered myself down to her and pressed my erection along her entrance, glancing down between us. I bit on my lip, not knowing if I could do this. She was so hot. Surely entering her would consume me and I wouldn't be able to control my actions. Why was I doing this?

I looked back up into her eyes, trying to plead, though I didn't know what for. I wanted to be inside Bella. I wanted to drive into her, over and over again. But I also wanted her alive, and for that, I needed control. She was stripping me of it.

I paused, unable to move forward. If this was my decision, I wanted to wait. Deep down, I didn't want to put Bella's life on the line like this, even if I wanted her as badly as I did. But if she spoke, if she said another single word that said yes, I wouldn't be able to stop.

**Wish I could just hear you talk**

"I need you," she said, softly. I closed my eyes and pressed my forehead against hers, feeling the control slip like water through my fingers. I had none left and I could only hope that four hundred years of keeping the hunger at bay would help me now.

I slid my hand down and guided myself into her. As she surrounded my head, I gritted my teeth. As I went in deeper, I shook, gasping out and feeling the need to cry working in the back of my throat. She cried out as our bodies finally came together and I was buried deeply inside her. I felt like I was on fire, yet numb.

I felt at home.

Her legs came up around me and I could feel her every movement from within her. Her warm legs surrounded my colder hips, trying to pull me closer. I braced both my hands on the bed as I pressed into her more, trying to get deeper.

She was still so tight, so constricted around me. She brought within her and kept me there, making a shiver press down my spine.

"Oh," she breathed out. I opened my eyes to see they were squeezed shut, her back was arched slightly, the back of her head pressed tightly into the bed. I rubbed myself against her, inside her and watched her press her head back further, exposing her neck, elongating it. I gasped out, my eyes transfixed on her.

_Stop._

I felt the lump in the back of my throat tighten as I tore my eyes away and pulled out of her a little, just to drive back into her, hard.

"Fuck," I gasped, feeling her sheath me completely, clenching around me. Her arms came around my neck, pulling me down into her. I began to rock in and out of her, listening to her breath come out in broken spurts. Mine mixed with hers, my body was flushing so hot I felt like I had a fever.

"Ca-Carlisle- oh, god, please don't stop," she pleaded, pressing her lips to my ear. I complied, but not because she asked. I didn't think I could stop. I don't know what I would have done if she'd asked me to. I started pulling out more and more each time, driving into her harder with each thrust. I felt some monster growing inside me each time our bodies came back together. I wanted to devour her.

"Isabella," I pleaded, not knowing what I asked for. For her to tell me this was ok, to calm the beast inside me, to stop me, to forgive me- I didn't know.

**Can something like this be pulled  
From under our feet  
Leaving our skin  
And burning coals to meet**

"I'm so close," she breathed into my ear. Her voice was broken, so filled with ecstasy. All my thoughts slipped away from me as my only goal was to make her come again. I wanted her to shatter around me and take me with her, for us both to spill over the precipice we were bordering on.

I began moving faster, just a little harder as I slipped one hand from the sheets at her side. I moved it to her breast and lifted it as I pulled away and curled in as I thrusted so I could reach her breast with my mouth. I sucked on her nipple, flicking my tongue over it, demanding that she orgasm for me. Her moans became more sporadic, her body tried to thrust back at me as hard as her little frame could manage.

I could feel something big, something dangerous building inside me. I growled around her breast, feeling it engrossing me. I couldn't stay here, I would bite her. I pulled away and moved back to her ear, pleading into her.

"Bella, come for me. Please, come for me now," I begged as I slid my arm beneath her arched back and pulled her up into me, thrusting wildly into her.

**Tell me now**

"Carlisle-" she started to cry but she was cut off, mid-gasp. Her body tensed again, I could only guess from the angle I had brought her into by pulling her up. I felt her walls clamp down around me and my whole body trembled. I could feel the venom filling my mouth, the hunger begging me to give in with my orgasm.

She screamed out my name as I cried out in frustration and relief, my orgasm exploding through me as her walls clamped around me, released, clamped, released. I held her tight to me, willing the hunger away and surrounding myself in the pleasure, holding on to it like a life line. I could hear Bella panting, I could feel her body starting to relax as I stayed within her, afraid to move, afraid to breathe. I swallowed the venom, several times, trying to recall the way Bella tasted in order to drown out the sense.

It was several minutes before I noticed Bella's small hands were stroking gentle, encouraging circles on my back. I finally let out the deep breath I had taken in and felt the relief inch through my body, one limb at a time. I lowered her into the bed, bringing myself down on top of her. I kept a hand braced on the bed to keep my full weight off her but she continued to urge me down, her hand on my shoulder.

"Lay on me, love," she whispered. I didn't have the energy to fight her. I slowly lowered myself onto her completely, letting my weight rest on her. Her and went into my hair, stroking through the strands gently. I closed my eyes and rested my head on her shoulder, feeling my fear finally dissipating. We had gotten through it. We had survived, the both of us.

Because surely, if I had bitten her, killed her, I too would have died.

**The shortest distance  
Between two points  
Is the line  
From me to you**

**A/N : Whew. I think I spent all my creative energy on that one…**

**Alright, guys. I think it's time I get a beta, what do you think? Are any of you out there reading this beta's? A good beta? Pm/ Review and let me know. I'm looking for someone who's ok at editing Carlisle's kind of thoughts and word choices. Also, I don't really know how beta-ing works, so if you could clue me in? I basically just know you're going to be my editor! **

**Review to keep me alive! You guys did a great job the first time! **


	3. Chapter 3

**Alright, readers. As with my other stories, I'm warning you. Show me the reviews and I'll show you the updates. I'm going to update the stories that are actually getting feedback, so do you want this one to succeed or not? Review! **

**Vampires bleed in my world. They take in blood, therefore, they should bleed. **

**Chapter song = Pain by Three Days Grace**

**Chapter 3 – Pain**

Edward's POV

Going through school that day, I was lifeless. It was just too difficult to handle all of my emotions. I wanted Bella, so badly. But the only thing she saw, the only one she ever saw, was Carlisle. I couldn't even think of him as my father any more. He was a great man, he had done so much for me… But he was taking Bella. Just by existing, he was taking her.

I was frustrated and upset. I longed for Bella to look at me the way she looked at Carlisle. Like every part of her would combust and disintegrate if she wasn't near him. How I looked at her…

I tapped my pencil loudly, earning a look from my teacher for my final class. I rolled my eyes. We were just reading the chapter and the bell was about three… two… one.

I jumped out of my seat and gathered my stuff, making my way out of the class. I bolted to my car and threw my stuff in the backseat. I could hear Alice, her voice chiming through the air.

"What's got you in such a rush?" she asked, Jasper trailing behind her. I barely spared them a glance as I got into my car.

"I've got to get home and talk to Carlisle. I can't just sit around and let this happen," I said, pulling on my door to close it. It wouldn't budge and I saw Jasper holding it firmly.

"Edward, don't do anything foolish," he said, and he lowered his voice for the next comment, "You knew this was gonna happen." I jumped out of the car and Jasper took a small step back, though not far. It was the soldier in him.

"It doesn't have to be this way. I love her, she can love me back," I spat. Jasper shook his head.

"Under that way of thinking, I could say she's in love, you can love someone else," he said. I gritted my teeth, I'm sure my eyes were dead black. I felt adrenaline running through me, making me want to lash out.

But it must reach the right person.

I jumped back into my car and slammed the door, speeding out of the parking lot. A glance in the rear view mirror showed Rosalie and Emmett joining my other siblings. Jasper was already getting in his car. They would be a few moments behind me. Enough for me to talk to Carlisle privately.

As I sped home, I didn't know what to expect. Bella hadn't gone to school today. We wouldn't subject her to all the questions, not yet. This was such a small town, everyone in school today had been talking about how Bella had been hospitalized. Had she talked to Carlisle? Had he turned her down again?

A little jolt of joy went through me at the thought. Maybe she'd finally see, she'd understand… I was perfect for her.

I pulled up into the driveway and didn't bother parking straight as I sped out of the car and up the steps to the house. I threw the door open and heard someone in the kitchen, so I dashed there.

"You're home early," Carlisle's smooth voice greeted me. His back was turned to me, he was bent over something at the counter. The repugnant smell of some kind of sandwich made its way to my nose.

"We need to talk-" I started, but I stopped. As the smells wafted around me, I finally identified them all. I watched Carlisle bristle and I stepped closer to him. I could smell Bella. A glance around had told me Bella was not downstairs, and her scent was _strong._

As I took another step closer, I realized it was rolling off of Carlisle in waves. He finally turned to face me and met me eye to eye. I wanted to vomit.

"You _fucked_ her?" I nearly screamed, feeling my pin point control begin to slip.

"Edward, I've kept her away for so long. Let me explain-" he started, but I was beyond listening. I lunged forward and attacked him. He crashed into the counter and I tried to get my hands around his neck. He maneuvered around me and slipped under my arm, escaping me. I turned but he grabbed hold of my arm and twisted it behind my back.

I let out a furious growl and slammed myself backwards, making him release my arm and a loud breath. My ears were ringing as I turned around and flung him into the wall, watching it crack behind him from the force. He slipped down the wall a little and raised his eyes to mine. They were pitch black, roaring fires of rage and he barreled towards me.

He tackled me to the ground and straddled me, trying to grab my arms as I flung them at him. I gave a roll of my back and forced him off me. I grabbed his shoulders and banged him into the ground, hearing his head crack against the tile. He threw his legs up and caught my shoulders, forcing me backwards and he was sitting on me then.

I brought my elbow up as he came down, fangs bared in an estranged hiss. I got him in the chest and he paused long enough for me to slide out from under him and stand. I lunged at him again and caught him around the neck, forcing him back up against the fridge. It was then someone dragged me off him.

My world was blotched with red, I was taken over by furry and I felt like I was trapped in a blizzard. My ears finally cleared and were placed with several sounds. I tried to identify them.

"What the fuck is your problem, man?" Emmett was yelling. Ah. So he was the idiot who had pulled me off my target. My eyes were still on Carlisle, watching him rub at a cut on his arm which was rapidly healing. The blood was still oozing.

"Edward!" a female voice yelled. Esme? I glanced around and blinked away some of the red, feeling my anger starting to dissipate. It was her. Her eyes were wide, her hand over her mouth as she glanced between me and Carlisle.

"I didn't even see this, it was so spontaneous- Jasper, it's ok. That's Carlisle, you aren't going to attack him," Alice was soothing. I turned to see Jasper in Alice's arms, his eyes black as he watched the still oozing cut on Carlisle.

"Carlisle, what-" a voice started, but it was cut short. My eyes flashed to the poor, feeble thing standing at the entrance to the kitchen. Bella, her brown hair tussled. It looked as if Carlisle had ran his hands through it, over and over. His fingertips might have scraped her scalp. She probably cried out in ecstasy. I felt venom pooling in my mouth.

She was wearing a long, black shirt. It barely covered her thighs. It must have been the only thing she could find when she heard us. Her eyes were on me first, but then she moved past and saw Carlisle, and I was lost to her.

"No," she breathed. One simple word and I felt all the guilt come crashing down on me. She ran past me, her scent so familiar, now so tainted. She threw herself into Carlisle's arms and after a split second, she had her hand on his shoulder, on his face, the back of his head, inspecting him. I felt the anger pulling through on me again. Emmett's embrace tightened on me.

"Are you ok?" she whispered, sounding like she was screaming in my ears. Her hand was stroking his cheek, his eyes were only for her, his hands on her waist. I gritted my teeth, watching as he lowered his forehead to hers.

"I'm fine, I only wish you hadn't seen this," he said. I took in a deep breath, trying to calm the rage. Bella suddenly rounded on me. Who knew someone with sex hair and barely any clothing could appear as such a threat to myself. I almost backed up into Emmett as she came towards me.

"You are such an arrogant asshole! I hate you, don't you get it? I want nothing to do with you, and if you ever come near Carlisle again, I'll rip your head-" she was screaming. Carlisle jumped forward and grabbed her by the shoulders as Emmett took another step back with me. She was furious, her eyes livid and deadly. Her hands were clenching and spreading, her nails looking ready to kill.

"It's ok, my love, calm down. Shhh," Carlisle was whispering in her ear, his nose buried in her hair. Jealousy was pounding through me, endlessly. Would I never get used to this feeling? It had been four years of this…

"Let me go, Emmett," I said, shifting in his grip.

"No way, man-"

"I'm not going to do anything, you idiot. I need to leave," I said, growling. I shook myself out of his hold and then turned my back on them all and left. I bounded out the front door and into the forest, running and not stopping for at least ten minutes. I had no idea where I was. I wasn't paying attention as I went. I finally let myself collapse next to a tree, letting out a few deep breaths as I crashed the back of my head against it.

I stayed there for what felt like hours, knowing it was no such thing. My thoughts were racing after each other. Scents, thoughts, emotions, they acted as whirlwinds. I could smell the lingering scent of Bella. Her arousal was like nothing I'd ever smelled. I remembered the first time I'd smelt it, when she was only 15, talking to Carlisle.

Carlisle. Shit. I'd attacked him. I brought my hand up and ran it through my hair, closing my eyes and listening to the forest around me. I had no idea how to handle the mess I'd gotten myself into…

There was a crack in the branches and I jumped up, crouching to attack.

"It's just me. They sent me after you, since I need to hunt anyways," Jasper said, stepping through the brush. I let out a breath. I hadn't even noticed him until he was practically on top of me. Bella was bad for me. "Care to join me?" he asked, nodding his head towards the endless forest. My arms went limp at my side and I joined him.

After we'd caught our food, him a panther, me a sweet doe with eyes like Bella's, we scaled the trees and sat at the top. I leaned against the heart of the tree at the top, my leg hanging off the branch I was on and swinging like a pendulum. Jasper was sitting but a tree away, lounging between two branches as he looked up at the sky.

"I don't know what came over me, Jaz… I've never, ever felt this way before…" I whispered, knowing he'd hear me. It took him several minutes to respond. He didn't take his eyes off the sky.

"Love and blood lust… Sometimes they feel interconnected," he said, his voice sounding amused. My love for Bella… When I saw her, all I wanted to do was take her. When I smelled her, all I wanted to do was hold her. Blood lust… The smallest pin prick, and we all wanted to attack. The scent in the air and we were prepared for the worst.

"… I saw the blood coming off Carlisle… I _knew_ it was him, that it was running through him. It took so much effort just to stop. I wanted to snap… And then Bella came in the room, her heart hammering, pumping the blood so effortlessly through her veins… Edward, I wanted to attack her," Jasper said, his voice getting lighter, his southern accent becoming thicker, sounding like he was walking away. He hadn't moved.

Something ran through me as he mentioned attacking Bella. My Bella. No, no one could have her. I swallowed and shut my eyes. _Carlisle already has,_ I tried to force the thought away.

"When I came in the house, Carlisle was in the kitchen… He smelled like her, he fucked her, Jaz. Like she's some common whore he can play with at leisure. He could have hurt her, she's human-" I broke off, clenching my eyes shut as I imagined Bella, her eyes wide in fear, lifeless beneath Carlisle. I opened my eyes to rid myself of the image. Jasper had sat up and was now watching me.

"You know Carlisle's not like that, Ed. He doesn't think of Bella that way, he's tried so long to stay away from her, for you… It just doesn't seem that's what she wants… When I'm around her- God, she puts my love for Alice to shame," he said, scoffing a little. I took in a breath and let it out, looking out over the tips of the other trees.

"It isn't right," I said, looking down into my hands.

"Loving someone like us… It isn't right. But her loving you wouldn't be any better. There's no reason she can't love Carlisle and love you instead. You two are the same thing, live the same way," Jasper said.

"He's older," I shot, glaring at him. Jasper smirked.

"What's a 300 year difference to Bella, between you and Carlisle? Edward, Bella being with you is just as 'wrong' as her being with Carlisle. You can't use that as your defense," he said, throwing a few leaves he had been collecting, letting them flutter to the ground.

"I love her. I've loved her since the beginning," I said, feeling a lump in my throat. If I was human, I'd be ready to cry.

"And Carlisle's fought his affections for her since the day he met her… I was there, Edward, I know. The day they met… There was so much between them, it put your feelings for her into the dirt. And I had thought your feelings for her the first day were strong," Jasper said. I pulled a leave off the tree and started ripping it to tiny pieces. It felt like I was ripping air.

"It's Bella's choice, Ed. All you can do is try and change her mind. And that probably doesn't include you attacking Carlisle," Jasper finished. I gave a short nod. I knew I'd fucked up in that area. But my jealousy was like blood lust. It was triggered in an instant. And so difficult to control.

Bella's POV

I ranted in the kitchen. I ranted until Emmett and Rosalie left, and Alice went outside. Esme left and Carlisle led me up the stairs. I still ranted. I didn't stop he opened the bedroom door for me.

"I can't fucking believe him. Who does he think he is-" I wasn't finished, but Carlisle had shut the door and his mouth was on mine. I gasped out as his hands swam around me, one going to my waist and the other to my ass. He gave a brief squeeze as his mouth moved against mine and then he moved his hand up to my cheek. He worked his lips furiously against mine, making my heart crash against my chest. It felt like it would break through.

When he pulled back, we were both gasping for breath. I opened my eyes to see him looking at me, his eyes black and hooded with lust. He looked lethal. He claimed my mouth again for a short kiss and then pressed his forehead against mine as his thumb stroked over my cheek.

"Edward's desire… He fought me for you. He fought with everything he had, Bella," he started, his voice cracking when he said my name. I pulled back a little and brought my hand up to his cheek, watching him lean into it and close his eyes. "I thought I was going to lose you. When I saw you, I thought you were going to choose him, as you should," he said, his eyes opening again. I was shaking my head, furiously.

"Never, Carlisle. I don't want him! I never have and I never will. I only want you…" I whispered, pressing my hips fully against him. He let out a deep growl and I felt how possessive he felt. His nails dug softly into the skin at my hip and I bit my lip as I looked up at him.

"You're going to be the death of me, Isabella," he whispered. I smiled as I brought him close, sliding my fingertips through his hair.

"Take me with you, then," I whispered as he moved forward to take me.

**A/N : Yep, the chapter's are getting shorter. I've been spoiling you guys with how long they are. **

**Review! Maybe the chapters will get longer… And maybe there shall be another lemon for you all in the next chapter? Yeah, I'm bribing you. I like the social contact. **


	4. Note

Yeah, I'm lame. I'm sorry guys, but fanfiction is going on hold for a while. I'm having issues again, for those of you who followed over here from A New Heart. You guys know about my past issues with my boyfriend. Yeah, same problems.

Think I'd learn, huh?

Anyways, wish me a speedy recovery. For those of you who are worried about private messaging me, thinking it's stalker-ish or whatever, don't worry about it. It's always nice to hear from someone knew. I wish you all the best at finding more stories to read until I can make it back into my ability to write.

Best wishes,

Tracy


	5. Update!

UPDATE

I'm sure you guys think I'm dead. I assure you, I am not! I'm so sorry it's taken me so long to get along with this. I'm in the process of getting all my notes and files together for all my stories so that I can catch up with them and begin writing again. I want to have a new chapter posted for every story by the end of this month!

So thank you, die hard fans of my writing. I really appreciate your support and I'm sorry this wasn't a chapter, but I thought you all deserved to know I have something in the works! Now you have something to anticipate!

Also, I don't know if my lovely Beta is still interested in beta-ing. Anybody interested, just in case?

Can't wait to hear from you guys! Are you excited? Tell me so I get started even sooner! Haha.


	6. Recently

Hello again everyone! Long time, no chat.

I've recently got a little swarm of you guys asking if I would be updating any time soon. As much as I would like to, I am now three months pregnant. As much as I can't wait for our little joy to be brought into this world, he/she has been keeping me bunkered down to the toilet and the bed, sleeping. I don't see myself updating any time soon, though I would like that to change. If I start feeling better, I could possibly have a lot more time to put effort into the chapters you guys deserve to read and update all of my stories. At this moment though, I cannot say that I will be posting any time soon. I do miss all of your reviews and short hellos, sadly. I hope you guys won't abandon me or these stories, as I do plan on finishing them, just not at present.

I miss you all! I hope to hear from some of you after you've read this, please accept my sincerest apologies.

Mwah


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